Journal: February 2010

Monday, February 22, 2010

The eternal white space is ever so blank.

Co-op is a strange experience.

Last work term I was very relaxed all the time. I was often told to finish something in two days that I can finish in 30 minutes. I didn't really understand at that time that they wanted you to finish in 2 days... My dad told me about a co-op whose boss told him straight up that he should just take his time and get the work done in 2 days, not earlier, thank you very much.

This work term is slightly different: I have "on" times and "off" times. By "on" I mean I get swamped to my neck. Non-stop. This lasts for 4-5 days. Then suddenly I have nothing to do. It's not that there's nothing to be done. It's that there's nothing for "me" to do... I try to ask for work, but because of the type of work I do not have the company experience to deal with it the way they wanted it to be dealt with - which is understandable. My boss also told me that I would have such "off" times and I could work on my workterm report in the mean time - which reminds me I still need to meet with her about that. Hmmm ::notes down:: This also lasts for 4-5 days... in which time I am not motivated to do anything personal either - for example, pd, because... okay, pd sucks, but besides that, probably because I still feel apprehensive about using company time for these things for an extended amount of time - a minute or two is okay (even if productive).

I need to get over that.

I realize I have a lot of unused time. But unfortunately the emotional impact on the consequences of wasting time hasn't hit yet. Maybe I just don't care, period. This would be bad, and needs to be righted. But I feel so apathetic all of a sudden. I'm having a late-teen crisis. Eeeek. Good thing I don't game as much or as mindlessly as last month. I depend on emotional impact too much...

Speaking of which, I need to make a post about gaming (and its related ills) sometime, and maybe ddr too...

Okay. Back to work.

-L