Lamenting

I am attempting to write once more. I figured I might as well try something to encourage the characters in my head to breathe for once, away from suffocating grey matter.

I saw this ad in MathNEWS from sci-fi club at UW about writing a 7500 word max story in the fantasy/sci-fi genre. The worlds in my head fall somewhat into that. I still harbour many of the same characters from so long ago, developed over long bus rides to and from school, and random snaps of vision while staring into white spaces.

I discovered that I can psychoanalyze myself using the stories and the characters; they express my fears, passions, failures, and hopes. Everything seem so developed in my head, until the inadequacy of words takes hold and when faced with a white (or whatever colour backgrounds I’ve tried) document, I am either slow, or writing in a mess of sporadic heat – with 0 grammar considerations and 0 style. I am only mad at the style.

I am also overly critical of my words, squinting at their feeble existence and willing unsuccessfully for them to be perfect, to be right, to fit with the developed vision in my mind’s eye. To breathe, essentially.

So I shall attempt to take on this writing contest – a small one not worthy noting, but good for practice and just getting a fraction of my worlds out there, onto a tangible surface.

Because my mind is translucent.

-L